Welcome, 2013

The year of 2012 was good to me. It had its moments but always came through in the end. If I’ve learned something, it is to not sweat the small stuff. It, too, shall pass, as they say.

I’ve grown closer to my family. What we’ve had to deal with in terms of moving, money, dogs and people will either break or unite. I’m glad to say we’re still going strong and show no signs of slowing down. I feel as though the world is a bigger and smaller place all at once. We keep our dreams alive but allow them to change a little. The past year was filled with insight and I plan to dedicate this year to taking action.

The pack has grown yet again and we’ve welcomed 2 new members; Sylvester, the chihuahua and Correia, the Rafeiro do Alentejo. They both fit in well and bring something new and inspiring. Once more we are shown that anything and everything is possible. These two were taken out of bad situations and came a long way to end up in a good one. True to their species, they always make the best of it. They react as a direct result of their surroundings, and so they serve as our constant reminders of the present.

Another big inspiration to me lately, is our former foster dog, Ranchi. He rose from pure hell and took a leap of faith with us. He learned how to trust, and with that trust came tremendous gifts to our family. Ranchi provided us with so much insight, so much wisdom and love. He was all about giving. His life is like a fairytale, it’s hard to believe he was ever aggressive. Come to think of it, my memory of him trying to attack me on our very first meeting seems more like a bad joke than a true story. He’s now been adopted and shares his life with a family of 5. His new name is Cappuccino and I’m glad they changed it. The name “Ranchi” was like a second skin he shed to shine, he finally shines.

To truly love our dogs is to honor them for what they are; dogs. Doing so will allow us to have the most profound relationship based on mutual trust and respect. It is when we create balance that we can live in harmony, and that’s really what we all want, isn’t it? 2013 will continue on as a year of maintaining balance. If I’m lucky, more Cappuccino’s will cross my path .

Training Cesar’s Way, with Cheri Lucas, Brian Agnew and Cesar Millan

A week ago I got back from California. Well, Santa Clarita and the Dog Psychology Center, to be precise .

About 6 weeks ago or so, I found out that I’d been accepted to attend a workshop called Training Cesar’s Way, featuring dog behaviorists Cheri Lucas, Brian Agnew and Cesar Millan himself. I almost passed out from the news, seeing as I applied for the course on February 24th, and had started to think I might not get lucky this time. When I finally settled I realized I’d have the chance to thank Cesar for all the things he’s brought my family (the pack!) through spreading his philosophy – at last! I decided to make him a scrapbook that he can keep at the Center, so everyone – including his staff and so on – can see and read about the wonderful things he has contributed to in one family/pack alone! I started with a letter, telling him about us and how grateful we are for everything that he does. Then I continued with two photos of me and Mike, photos of where we used to live (in the apartment on the top floor of an 11 story building!) and where we live now (a small house in a tiny town in the middle of the woods), and of course, all the dogs; our own, every single one we have rehomed, the ones we foster now, and some of the ones I know at the shelter in Spain. The scrapbook ends with a tribute to my beautiful mother, because she’s the reason I was able to go in the first place, and because she supports me in everything I do, even though I seriously scare her at times! Then I put a big picture of Pegasus at the end, with a sticker-business card of our Dogs of Pegasus, since that’s the result of some damn hard work!!! I gotta say I’m pretty happy with it. It shows who we are and what we stand for, but most importantly, it’ll serve as a reminder to Cesar when he’s 85 and sitting at the Center by his beloved wooden Buddha, of what he’s accomplished in his life - at least a teeny, tiny fraction of it .

By the Buddha.

Cesar seemed to like it!

They all did!

Hm, maybe I should explain this one… There was one page that had pictures of the injuries that Mike and I have gathered along the years. Swollen, bloody body parts, to be exact. The point of it was that a balanced pack didn’t come easy… Judging by his look he was…amazed? Shocked? Horrified? I dunno!

There was lots to do and get ready before the trip, but a few days or so before my departure, a real state of calmness devoured me. I felt so at peace with where I was headed and what I was about to experience, and none of it felt stressful or nerve-wracking at all. I brought our black pug Adela with me, and she was the best companion ever! She was flawless all the way and I couldn’t be more proud of her! She slept through the whole 15-hour flight, and was a real trooper during our complete stay.

Adela’s all freaked about being so close to Cesar…not .

I like flying, even during 15 hours, so although sleeping was pretty uncomfortable, I enjoyed the entire trip. Suzanne was there too, but she didn’t enjoy it quite as much… Either way, I thought nothing was going to bring me down from my happy-go-lucky state of mind.

Ha! Greenland!

That was until they lost our luggage. OK, so they didn’t lose it, which is even worse. Some kind of problem at the airport in Frankfurt messed everything up, and we were told we’d receive our luggage the next day. It was fine, I guess, but I worried I wouldn’t get my things in time for the Welcome Reception at the hotel, hosted by Cheri Lucas and Brian Agnew. Well, I didn’t. Instead of the 4 hours they said it would take for us to get it when I called the next day, it took almost 12. We had to hurry to the closest mall and get some stuff in order to be, uhm, “presentable” for the evening, which busted my whole budget. On the SECOND day, people!! Oh well, the reception was awesome, I met lots of cool people and managed to regain my earlier balanced state of mind. Could it get any better than this?

Necessities from the airline. Oh, good, now I’m all set for the reception…?!

Hell yeah, it can! The next morning when we got to the DPC (by the way, thanks again, Stacey, for driving me e-v-e-r-y day, and Donna for just being there!) I felt a bit overwhelmed. It was like I was dreaming, and I had to keep myself from pinching my arm so that people wouldn’t think I’m crazy… The Center looked different from how I had imagined it, yet it felt like I had been there before, it was all too weird. We started the course by doing a pack walk, and Adela and I kept a low profile during every one of those walks. I guess we were too busy taking it all in and living in the moment in our own way and pace, and felt no need to keep up. I saved my moment to walk the pack for last, with just a couple of girls there. My instincts told me to do so, and man, am I happy I did.

Part of the DPC.

All that greatness and I only had eyes for my doggie – aww! No, wait, I told her to hold still!

Cute detail!

The pool and kennel area.

I really liked this one!

The “Gavin-trailer”. Remember Gavin?

Having lunch, at what a lunch it was! The food was supreme, delicious, fabulous!

With good ol’ Bas, a gorgeous Cane Corso I just happened to fall in love with .

Doing our thing…

…waaay behind the others.

For me, following my instincts is actually what this entire trip was all about. I’ve always been known to do so, but here I took it to a whole other level. This was also me reaching for the stars and living my dream. It was all in the details, but listening to my inner voice created an even better experience for me. Even the time when I told myself I should “go with the flow” and join the gang for tequila, something I ended up pretty much regretting altogether the next morning, turned out to be a lucky throw. From time to time I have quick flashbacks, and it seems I had a dangerously good time (sorry for any mess-ups, Valerie, Alicia, Sverre, Shinji, Josh, Glen and the rest of you that might not have appeared in my flashbacks yet…)… And the dinner at that cute Mexican place, when I was deathly tired and just felt like going to sleep, that turned out to be one of the best nights for me! Cool chick Krystal, sweetheart Brenda, generous Lea, beautiful Adriana and the rest of the bunch - what better company could you ask for?

Not my cup of tea…obviously.

But food – now, that’s more like it!

Everyone asks me how much we got to see Cesar, so let me just get that out of the way. Cesar was there 2 days out of 4, for a few hours each time. Then he attended the Graduation Dinner on the last day, and that’s it. I was well aware of how much Cesar was going to be there and I’m more than okay with how it all went down. Cheri and Brian are more than capable of taking the lead and they made damn sure we all had a good time and got what we came there to get! Sure, it’s amazing to meet Cesar and see him do his thing in action and talk to him and so on, but that’s only part of the greatness of this experience! I was at the DPC, learned from the best, met so many awesome people, made so many great new friends, witnessed so many transformations and shared a hell of a cool experience with my own gal, Adela! What I took home with me was the power of the pack, both human and canine, the soul of the DPC, the lessons from the world-class behaviorists and the memories that I’ll treasure forever. That I was able to hand over my gift to Cesar and go through it with him is just the icing on the cake .

Our own A Team

Cesar in action with Rottweiler Bodhi and amazing photographer Josh.

I arrived at the DPC for the Graduation Dinner in a red dress. A bit surprisingly, Adriana Barnes (director of the DPC) and Cheri Lucas also wore red dresses! Cheri presented us with a gift from Adriana, telling us a story about a student who she had seen taking a couple of rocks from the Center and putting them in her purse… I started sweating; She knows? It turns out she was referring to a former student, and the point of the story was that she had told Cheri she wanted to bring a piece of the Center home with her, and that’s really what we all wanted, too! Without knowing this story, Adriana had come up with this gift for us, that actually was 2 rocks from the Center, with a touching message attached. It was a hard and a soft stone, for good times and for bad. It was so moving! Anyway, I forgot to take mine… The weirdest part about that is that I’m not upset over it! It makes me feel like I’m not done with the place, I will be back there some day. I even doubted that feeling at one point, and asked Lea to get it for me, but when she got there it was nowhere to be found and Adriana had left! So, I’ll stop interfering with fate now. Also, I still have the rocks that I took myself! Nevertheless, it will be good to go back with Mike sometime and show him what all the fuss is about . But for now I have to focus on not pinching myself, ’cause I don’t WANT to wake up!

With the lovely Adriana…

…and sweet Jahira and Cesar.

Cesar calls my name tele novela-style .

Hugs for everyone when I receive my diploma!

Funny Stacey dances her way to the stage to get hers, and what a memorable moment that was!

Group shot!

I’d like to thank EVERYONE involved in this course, each and every one of you made it SO special and great. I also want to thank Lea and Krystal especially, for everything you did, Stacey for driving me e-v-e-r-y day, Donna for just being there and being great, Roy for putting up with my eagerness to learn about kosher (!), Glen for giving me business ideas, Adriana for all those touching words and help after “tequila-night”, Shinji for driving us around LA to get to the airport, and Suzanne for temporarily filling the holes in my budget . All you guys are amazing!

*** I’m still waiting for the photos that Josh the photographer took, and won’t they make the best post ever! Sit tight!

Dogs of Pegasus

Time flies as usual, and if you can believe it, Mike and I have placed no less than 8 foster dogs in new loving homes during the last month. 8!!! The month before that we placed another 5, and needless to say, that takes up most of our time. That, and our own fabulous pack, of course!

Some other exciting news is that we’ve finally opened up our very own rescue/rehab/rehoming business, called Dogs of Pegasus. See:

www.dogsofpegasus.com (It’s all in Swedish for now, but there are some cute photos anyone can enjoy!)

It’s a dream-come-true at its very beginning, and we’re definitely looking forward to where it’ll take us. Role models and muses for this project are of course no others than the very special and beautiful members of our canine family: Alfie is our poster boy because he represents the severity of our ability and Legolas is our success story. Evian is where it all began, Adela taught us about biological defects, Bob is the ongoing project, Yoshi is the toy-sized role model, Mafaldah is the youngster-in-training, and Scooby and Daysee Mae started our passion for rescue and rehoming, thus being responsible for the 20 dogs (our own 3 Spaniards not included) we’ve now rehomed in the last 10 months.

So far this year has already exceeded our expectations on so many levels. As late as February we had no idea we were moving, and along with that move came so many new opportunities for us. Dogs of Pegasus is just one of all the great accomplishments we’ve made in 2012, but one I’m extremely proud of. Looking back, I still haven’t forgotten about the hard times we went through during the first half of the year. There were moments when I was really on the verge of collapse and felt like the easiest thing would’ve been to just give up and go under… Fortunately, I’m not one to take the easy way out – ever!

My family is what’s keeping me going, keeping us going, and for the year of 2013 (or for the rest of this one, for that matter) there’s no telling what we’ll be up to .

Helping Morris and Kristina

Yesterday was special to us because our very first client was coming to see us with her German Shepherd, Morris. I was super-excited, but already started unwinding the day before to make sure I wasn’t going be in the wrong state of mind.

Kristina, the owner, had called me because she didn’t know how to handle Morris. He got nervous and stressed out very easily and he lunged at other dogs on the walk. He got overly excited while meeting new people and was over-all hard to handle for her. Kristina had sought help for most of Morris’ lifetime (he’s 7 years old) but was disappointed time and again by trainers telling her to put him down, and others asking why she bothered to keep a dog like this in the first place. She’d heard more than once that her dog was “nuts”, and since she doesn’t use him for competing in various sports, other GSD owners wondered what she got out of this dog anyway… These are a bunch of sad statements I thought we’d use as our motivation to prove them wrong!

As soon as I saw Morris I knew he wasn’t aggressive, and that he is in fact a very manageable dog. We started by taking a short walk while discussing Kristina’s side of the story, and what she didn’t know is that I used that as an opportunity to observe her in action. Then I took his lead and walked him back, while showing and explaining to her what she did wrong and how to do it instead. Kristina was a good student, she immediately acknowledged her mistakes and committed to learning, which makes my job a whole lot easier! I find it so refreshing to meet owners who are fast to admit their mistakes in order to move on quicker, all for the sake of their beloved dogs.

When back at the house I suggested that I take Morris and introduce him to our pack on my own, so Kristina and Maria (who tagged along for the fun and learning experience of it) drove away to get some ice cream instead. I said I’d call as soon as he was ready for visitors . The reason I didn’t want them to be present for the introduction is of course that Kristina would influence Morris negatively, which wouldn’t do any of us any good. Once I knew his owner was well off-reach I called on Mike to bring out Alfie. I wanted him alone so he wouldn’t be additionally empowered by our pack, and because he wouldn’t be extra protective of them as well. The introduction of the two went as expected. Morris became insecure when Alfie came flying out of the house full-speed, and the two of them stood super-close while barking at each other, showing all of their teeth and shooting saliva… What probably sets Mike and I apart from many others is that a situation like this doesn’t scare us. We just picked up a broom each to make us look bigger, and then we corrected the both of them by grabbing them and claiming the space between them. They circulated for a bit, but since we were present the whole time they weren’t given the opportunity to fight. Also, it was pretty obvious that they wouldn’t. Had they wanted to fight they would have right away, it was simply just a dominance/territorial settlement, of which Mike and I came out as the “winners”. At one point I put Morris on his side and held him until he’d given up and stopped challenging Alfie. At the same time Mike made Alfie give up a lot of space, and the distance he created made him snap out of it and focus on Mike instead. After a couple of minutes we were able to take a seat and just watch them. Morris decided to stay on the patio near the water bowl, and because we were there, Alfie didn’t try to prevent him from drinking, which is otherwise one of the ways he controls other dogs. As long as Morris stayed in place Alfie was cool, and when Morris started to move around in the yard we’d snap Alfie out of the focus he put on him. After about 10 minutes Morris showed Alfie obvious signs of respect, and Alfie remained calm and collected, although he retained his dominance over Morris. We think it’s natural that there’s a hierarchy among the dogs as long as they’re all submissive to us and don’t bully each other. Balanced dogs don’t have a problem with hierarchy, and out of the two Alfie was the more balanced one.

Then we switched. Alfie was taken inside while the rest of the pack was brought out. The reason Alfie had to go back inside in order for the others to come out is that he can be protective of the females and we didn’t want him to interfere in the beginning. This introduction went very smoothly, also as expected. As always, Legolas did an excellent job of keeping Morris in line, it was like watching Daddy himself in action! I called Kristina and asked them to come back, and after clear instructions of “No Touch, No Talk, No Eye contact”, they were let in to watch Morris interact with the pack. Both Kristina and Maria were overwhelmed by all the dogs and were fascinated by the harmony within the pack. But most of all Kristina was proud of her boy Morris, how well he did – and how fast! This particular part is actually more for the owner than the dog, since us humans often need to see to believe. And for Mike and I it was a treat to watch Kristina make these HUGE eyes of wonder for her ol’ boy. To think that he could actually DO it!!! 

Since they were already here we thought we’d practice a little with Alfie as well. We put Morris in the garage and brought out Alfie so he could meet our guests. Now that we live far away from friends and family we won’t get many visitors, so every opportunity to practice on Alfie meeting strangers is gold! He did extremely well, and we owe that to our guests who played their part flawlessly. We decided it was too early for Kristina to see Alfie and Morris together because even though it went so well in our presence, their relationship was still fragile enough to get disrupted by unstable energy. Instead she got to watch them on film!

The last part of the demonstration concluded a walk past another dog. We had “saved” our foster dog Buddha for this very special task, he was the only one that hadn’t met Morris yet. We chose Buddha because he’s big enough to be intimidating and could very well provoke that unwanted behavior from Morris that I was dying to see. He’s also a very stable guy, so we knew he wouldn’t become provoked himself. Mike had Buddha and I had Morris, and Kristina walked behind me to watch and learn. According to her, Morris goes from 0 to 10 in a split-second, but for some reason I couldn’t imagine that being the case, and suspected she only needed to learn how to spot the early signs of a lunge. I was right. As soon as Morris became alert and zoomed in on Buddha I gave him a correction, and that was it. No fuss, no muss, he just kept on going without even flinching. Kristina was amazed but unsure if she was able to get the same result. She imitated my body posture and sure enough – Morris was an angel . This was exactly the kind of confidence-booster Kristina needed, and she left us feeling happy and hopeful. I am now about to write my evaluation of Morris, along with specific advice and solutions, which Kristina will receive shortly.

As our first client (not exactly, but in the aspect of a stranger contacting us solely for the matter of helping a dog without rehoming it) we will always remember Morris and Kristina. We’re also extremely grateful for the opportunity of helping out, and learning new things from yet another amazing canine teacher. So thank you for that, Morris and Kristina! We’d also like to thank Maria for spreading the word about what we’re doing, and for entrusting us with her friends .

I’ll soon be sharing a video of Alfie and Morris together. Nothing much happens, but that’s exactly what’s so great about it!

Toodles!

Past, present and the future

Wow, has it really been that long?!

A lot has happened since last time. We’ve moved out of the apartment and into our new house (finally) and so far 5 dogs have been adopted through us, of which we fostered 4 of them ourselves.

Antonello, the angel we had the pleasure of getting to know for almost 6 weeks, was adopted by the same couple who adopted Archie, another podenco we didn’t get the chance to foster (because he was adopted immediately). Their success story moved us to tears, and gave us a couple of new great friends; Susan & Bore.

I went to Spain and picked up 5 “little” ones (Archie was one of them) and out of the 4 remaining we now only have Buddha left. Blaue, Juana and Jade have all moved on to their new families, and as always, we’ve made new dear friends and learned more valuable lessons along the way. Buddha is a big dog, which is always a bit trickier finding a suitable home for, but I’m very confident that the right person for the job will come along soon. He fits in perfectly with our pack, and has gone from absolutely terrified of Alfie, to becoming his new best pal. Alfie has taught him to guard, and Buddha offers that big-bodied buddy Alfie’s always wanted. Being his size means finding play mates is pretty difficult, so it’s nice to see that not only Mike and I, the foster dogs and the new owners benefit from this experience – so does our pack! We’re tremendously happy that we’re able to offer them the experience of welcoming new members and getting to know them. It’s a luxury far too few have the pleasure of experiencing.

Maria is not only Juana’s (now Inez) new owner, she is someone I like a lot and think of as a friend. When we first met she was unsure and not exactly overly confident. I sensed right away that Inez was her perfect match, because together they could grow and learn from each other. I love it when my intuition is right-on! The two of them are a match made in heaven and it’s an adoption I’m very happy to have been part of. Maria shares their ups and downs (although there hasn’t been many downs), and not only that – she presented me with our very first client! You see, I noticed a while ago that an adoption was pretty much considered to be a matter of finding a dog a new owner, preferably a nice person capable of coming up with the dough that was asked for. Short or insufficient evaluation was made of the dog in question, and even less investigation was made of the owner-to-be. Then, when the adoption was settled, inadequate - if any - information was given the new owner on how to handle their new dog, themselves, and any common situations that would possibly occur. This means that a dog not properly evaluated went to live with an owner not properly investigated provided with insufficient information to make it all work out! Needless to say, mistakes were made and some dogs had to be moved, others were actually killed because the people involved lacked the knowledge needed to realize the dog wasn’t actually psychotic, it was  in fact only dealt with the wrong way.

I thought to myself that it’s unacceptable that dogs are blamed for our mistakes, especially when it is so easily fixed! I decided to write a booklet where I deal with everything from how to best greet and welcome your new dog, to how to establish leadership and keeping it. I also address some common issues and situations, along with giving specific solutions and advice on what to do and what NOT to do. My goal was to educate the new owners before they came to pick up the dog, in order for them to achieve the best relationship possible, thus greatly reducing the risk for serious mistakes. In addition to that I have to make sure I evaluate our foster dogs properly, and another idea I had was that it would be good to share that information with the new owner. That’s why the new owner gets a copy of my written evaluation of the dog as well. I figured it’s always good to have that handy, so it’s easy to get fast information, ideas, inspiration and motivation when it’s most needed. Another important part of the job is of course to investigate the prospective owners. They need to be thoroughly evaluated, too! Even though finding any possible “dirt” beforehand is a desirable thing, what I’m mainly looking for is material to be able to match the right person with the right dog. If I get all that stuff right…well, then I might just have a successful adoption on my hands!

This is a passion of mine, something I’d love to do full-time. And I would, had it been possible financially. I also love helping people with their dogs; the problems they might have with them, and the issues they might have with themselves. Here is where the financial part comes in. I thought I’d open up our very own Dog Psychology Center, where people can come and get help for all kinds of trouble involving their dogs, and there would be many ways for me to do it! Either a consultation is enough, or I could simply do a demonstration, but best of all, we have a balanced pack to help us out! We could offer a boot camp for the more serious cases. Maria’s friend will be our very first client. She has asked me for help with her German Shepherd and I am very excited to have them over. I promise to share the outcome later on.

In addition to running a DPC we would definitely continue to foster and manage adoptions. My plan is to offer a consultation and demonstration to every new owner free of charge, along with the possibility of further help (should it become needed) with a discount for shelter dogs. This will be our way to contribute to the problem of overpopulation of dogs.

Our dream is that Mike will be able to join me full-time, and I’m certain that some day he will. But for now it will have to do just having him around when he’s not at work. The most important thing right now is that he’s supportive, and he sure is!

I really think this could work. I mean, I’ll make sure it does!

Antonello – adopted.

Archie – adopted.

Blaue (Kalle) - adopted.

Juana (Inez) – adopted.

Jade – adopted.

Buddha - still to go.

Let me tell you a story…

…about what happens when you’re disrespectful of a person’s house rules!!!

I have a friend whom I’ve known for years and years. She visits me regularly and every time it’s the same old story… See, we have a sign on our door that says :

“We’d like to ask all of our guests to come in without greeting our dogs! If you’d like to greet them we’ll let you know when it’s okay. This applies to EVERYONE who comes here, even those of you who “know” the dogs. It is really important that you respect our rules, for our, their, and other visitors sake. THANK YOU! “

And here it is (we haven’t updated it since we got Mafaldah, hence her not being featured in the collage . Oh, and that says there are 8 dogs living here, save them in case of danger).

Although it’s getting better, I’d say roughly 7 out of 10 guests couldn’t care less about the sign. They don’t care!!! They read it thoroughly, I open the door, and then most people burst into a freakin’ musical! They yell, sing, dance, wave and pet, all at once. The dogs get over-excited, and I get annoyed. I remind them of the sign, they ignore me, I repeat myself in a stern voice, and they tell me it’s ridiculous and keep at it. We get into a discussion about why I have the sign and what it means, and since they don’t get it I have to remind them that they’re in my home and must follow the rules. But why, dear god, must this happen e-v-e-r-y time?!?! Why is it so hard to ignore the dogs?!

Oh, nevermind. I know the answer(s) to that, I get it all the time. “But they want to say hello! I can’t just ignore them, they’ll get upset!!”, or “But it’s better to get it out of the way, then they’ll calm down”. Or, my favorite; “Oh, but look at them! They’re so CUTE!!!”. And all I wanna do, is lie down on the floor and kick and scream like a kid in the toy store who won’t get that LEGO piece. But I don’t. I sigh and repeat myself over and over and over and over…hoping some day they might just get it.

That day had not come when I had my friend over about a month ago. I saw her through the peep-hole, reading the sign, word by word. When I opened the door, Alfie did what he always do, or at least used to do; he stuck out his head and started smelling her. He does this to check the person out. If he’s left alone, again – like the sign says – he’s done in a few seconds and gets back in. However, if you take it as a sign that he wants you to start yelling  “Hello, big guy!” in an annoyingly loud and baby-ish voice, while throwing out your hand – preferably towards his face while staring him in the eyes – he will most likely start barking at you. How threatening he will be depends on how threatening you are to him. In these cases I will correct him, get him inside, and then explain to you that you should have practiced “no touch, no talk, no eye contact”, like it says on the sign. The thing is, when Alfie has made his mind up about someone, he rarely changes it. This might stem from that person being forever scared of him, thus always projecting an unstable energy when he’s around, which he reacts to. Or he just doesn’t like you from now on.

My friend did exactly everything she shouldn’t have done. Just as Alfie had accepted her and was about to go inside, she did the annoying tidbit I told you about. He went wild and started barking at her, while jumping at her. I got him in, corrected him, and, well, you know the rest. She was here for about an hour and Alfie was asleep the whole time. When she was leaving I walked in front of her to the door, not knowing she had stopped behind me to pet Alfie again… Let me remind you, this is a true story, my friend is a smart grown woman in her late 40′s, and…yeah, I’m not lying!

I heard a noise, turned around, and saw her pulling back her hand. Alfie jumped up, barked like crazy, and ultimately made a jump straight for her face… She turned around, ducked down, and fell to the floor. It all happened so fast! The other dogs started barking, going after each other in attempts to correct one another for misbehaving and I had to figure out as quickly as I could where to begin breaking it up. I corrected Alfie, who immediately stopped. Then I dealt with the others, before finally turning to her. She was standing up, Iphone in hand, checking her email. “Wow, that was loud!”, she said, quite calmly. “Yeah, that’s why I don’t want people giving them attention unless I say it’s okay, ’cause it easily gets out of hand if I’m not there to control it” I muttered. She said she was okay and then she left, saying she’d come back to see me soon. Well, the next day her boyfriend told me she had been bitten. Apparently Alfie got hold of her shirt when she turned around and he’d grabbed her by it in the back, scraping her with his teeth. She’d been too shocked to notice at first, hence the surprising email-checking right after. It took me a while to get it, I mean, I never saw that happening and she didn’t tell me! I know he didn’t bite her – ’cause then she’d have a hole in her back -  but he did nip her to scare her, and that’s far enough.

I thought a lot about this. I can’t tell you how many times I went over it in my head, trying to find answers to my questions. Alfie is a Sarplaninac, so this type of behavior is to be expected. But accepted? Not the same thing. Our dogs are not allowed to bite anyone, unless we’re in real danger. But what is real danger to him? And, as I’ve said before, am I setting him up to fail when I expose him to a situation like this, that is completely abnormal to him? In other words, what can I rightfully demand of him, while in this situation? Obviously, I can’t even expect my visitors to respect the rules, so when they cross the line, what can I demand of him? Little did I know I’d get the answers I was looking for, from Cesar Millan himself.

Two days after the incident, we met Cesar. This is exactly what I asked him, after telling him all that had happened. He didn’t know the breed, but understood the type when I compared it to the Caucasian Ovcharka. He reacted with surprise, and then he was impressed. “Wow”, he said, while nodding his head slowly. “You have one of those? That’s a tough breed!”. I told him we had wanted the most difficult breed we could think of, and the reason is we thought that if we can handle that, we can handle anything. Since we want to work with dogs, it’s important we have experience with extremely difficult cases. Cesar agreed and said we sure picked a good one! I bet he ran upstairs to google the breed afterwards…

Anyway, Cesar said that we’d never be able to take away his protectiveness, it’s Alfie’s DNA, so he is what he is. And I’ll never be able to predict people’s actions, so that will always be an uncertainty that can result in an accident. Therefore, he recommended that I teach Alfie to stay in the social zone when we get company, meaning some meters away. That way I’d be asking something rational of him, buying myself the time to do the same of my visitors, and more importantly, the space to be able to stop a potential faux pas. He confirmed my thoughts on exposing Alfie to something very unnatural, but concluded that asking him for space while guests come in isn’t too much to ask, and should be something I could get him to do. He said that Alfie is still young, that he will get more protective with time, so I need to be able to control him. Even if you can’t curb his instincts, you can come up with a strategy to work around it, so he’ll still be able to do his job while at a safe distance. Something like that .

It was just what I needed to hear. I wasn’t completely off track here, but I needed some new ideas! Remember the toy I tried distracting him with? Worked for about 2 days. Since then I’ve been at a loss, but Cesar gave me my motivation back. I was so inspired, and instantly felt an urge to go home and make it happen! Cesar also advised us to send Alfie to the back of the pack (hierarchy-wise) , because I told him that he has no difficulties controlling the whole thing! I told him about when the dogs stopped drinking one day. After a few days Mike and I started worrying, but when we noticed that Alfie was the only one drinking we kinda got the picture! The little bastard took possession of the water bowl! And that’s not it! When he had figured out that we were on to him, he wouldn’t stand in front of it anymore, but when the others still wouldn’t drink we saw that he was controlling it from afar! He could lay across the room and give a pack mate a certain look when they approached the bowl, and they would back off in submission – without so much as a sip! So much for thinking the pack would help us raise him! The thing is Alfie might be running the pack, but he does a damn good job at it. He keeps them in line and actually helps me out. But that’s not the problem. The problem is when I need to keep him in line, then I’ve got no help from the others! I guess it’s a matter of balance; not too much, nor too little. If I’m good enough I’ll be able to see the difference, and I’m getting there.

The first visitor I had after talking to Cesar was 4 days later, and it just so happens it was my friend’s daughter. Naturally, she knew about what had happened, but she was cool as a breeze when she walked in. She wasn’t tense at all, and I’m flattered that she trusts me that much. Before I opened the door I asked Alfie to sit about 12 meters away from the door. He obeyed me without a single protest. I had no trouble getting her inside, and just to practice, we spent 3 hours in another room. He didn’t make a sound, which has never happened before. Alfie wants to stay close when we have company, so he can keep an eye on things, but this time he knew I had it covered and he wasn’t needed. When I opened the door 3 hours later, he was still sitting in the same spot, waiting for me to tell him otherwise!! My guest was impressed, but not as much as me. I was thrilled!! I had proof that it worked, that I could do it, and I’ve been doing it ever since. Some folks, like tall men for instance, is a little bit trickier getting inside without Alfie reacting. But by now he knows he can let off one bark, and then it’s enough. And he has to stay put, which he does. Everyone is complimenting him on how good he is, and how impressed they are with him. They certainly notice the difference!

The ultimate test came last Friday, when I had my friend back over. I had avoided talking to her before this, so that my instructions wouldn’t scare her. I relied on the fact that Alfie had taught her the seriousness of the matter, and I didn’t think I needed to emphasise it even more. I was right! She was calm and collected, and didn’t pay attention to Alfie. I could sense it was fake, though, of course she was attentive and well-prepared, but at least she knew how to “fake it ’til you make it”! Alfie passed with flying colors, and I was so proud. I let him into the room after a while and he fell sound asleep in a jiffy. My friend and I talked it over and although I’m sorry to say that she completely failed to see her part in what happened, she now knows better than to disrespect the house rules!!! She feels like Alfie was mean to her when all she wanted to do was pet him. When he looked at her she said he was thinking that he was sorry for being mean… What can I say? I told her she made a mistake for not listening, and then not respecting his space when he clearly showed her he wasn’t interested in communicating. And I made a mistake for letting him think it was his job to be our bouncer. But Alfie did nothing wrong! He acted according to the signals we gave him, which is our fault. She might not be ready to accept that yet, but maybe the next dog she unfortunately pushes the limits with will give her the lesson she needs. It’s just sad that some people need to get hurt to get the message, and some dogs need to get blamed to get it through to them…

My thanks goes out to my mentor, although he doesn’t know he’s it. It’s incredible that he came to the rescue when I needed him the most. And Alfie’s now doing better than ever .

Unbelievable is what it is

Something BIG has happened, and I mean BIG!!! At first I couldn’t believe it, although I really wanted to, but then I could actually feel it. It really DID happen!

Oh, come on, you know what I’m talking about.

It’s what Mike and I always dreamed about, but none of us ever thought would occur.

It’s what we’ve always hoped for, but never really dared to believe.

Isn’t it obvious??

I WAS GIVEN A KISS BY ALFIE!!!

Incredible, right?! The dog finally gave me a kiss, and it took him almost 2 bloody years!!!

He doesn’t like it when you kiss him in the face, and giving kisses himself is just unthinkable. We don’t force him either, out of respect for his wishes. We believe a dog is entitled to his own opinions about his own face, as long as he’s not aggressive about it. Forcing him will only make him dislike you, and has nothing to do with building a good relationship based on trust.

And he actually kissed me voluntarily, just out of the blue! Can you imagine?

God, I love that dog .

My main man